Self-Care in Cooking

Well, gentle reader. What can I say. The last week has been a lot. Like so many weeks are now being a lot.

Not so much in the external, either, though that is taking its toll, too. But no, mostly it is the internal.

There are many shifts happening, as is to be expected, when on explodes an identity. Or at least, realises that is actually is an identity, and what is more: an identity based on someone else's interpretation of you.

It may not sound like much, but just imagine: You realise that, years ago, a trusted person told you something about yourself, and because they were trusted, you never questioned it. You took it on board. Because it gave you direction, purpose, meaning.

And fifteen years later you are wondering how much of that which you are being right now is actually true. Is actually you.

And how much is you shaping yourself to another's understanding.

Welcome to my reality.

And because of that happening internally at the moment, this week, there weren't really Adventures in the kitchen. It was all expressions of self care. Of grounding. Of doing something that I love doing - and I know this is me, because this is a fairly recent development. One which has nothing to do with trusted person.

(Mind you, I don't blame them. At all. This is all me, taking the bit between the teeth and running with it. And now realising it.)

So, this is three days of hitting a point of internal rock bottom, I almost want to say, though experience tells me it's not. It is, however, confusing and leaves you floundering around internally, looking for something solid, something fixed, to hold onto, to reorient yourself.

Only there is nothing. Nothing at all ...

And so: the gentlest, most loving and caring thing I could do for myself at that point was - go into the kitchen, get out some veggies, start chopping.

Welcome to this week's Kitchen Self-Care:

Kitchen Self-Care with Joy

In that vein, the first thing I made is very much a comfort food. Root vegetables, coconut milk - it's sweet and rich and dense.

It's also full of parsnips, because I had five in the fridge from last week's box, and I knew when I unpacked them that I wanted to make this dish. The one in the picture above; a variant of a dish a friend made - and that friend never cooks from recipes, she had this dish somewhere and liked it and wanted to recreate it. And now I recreated hers. With some adjustments. And so it evolves ...

What it entails:

• 5 parnips

• 1 yellow potato

• 200g or so of yellow lentils

• one can of coconut milk

• and onion

• coconut oil

• salt, pepper, curry powder

• and some frozen spinach

• juice of half a lime

• originally also some chilis

How it's made:

• wash the parsnips and the potato and cut into small cubes

• peel and dice the onion

• heat cocnut oil in a pot and sauté the onion for a minute or two, stirring the entire time

• then add parsnips and potato, keep stirring

• wash lentils and add to the pot, stirr well and keep stirring for a bit, so the lentils can be fried a little, too

• then add water and teaspoon of salt, reduce heat, put lid on top, and cook gently for about 12 - 15 minutes

• though you might also try cooking this in the coconut milk

• once cooked, drain remaining water, add coconut milk, season to taste with salt, pepper, curry powder, stir in frozen spinach, put lid back on

• let everything sit until the spinat has thawed

• stir well

• enjoy

You can also add sultanas to the dish or peanuts.

It is a great, comforting, nourishing dish, with sweetness from the parsnips and coconut milk, and some gentle heat from the curry powder. The original dish adds chopped chilis, so it can be made really hot.

I added the spinach, to have something green in there, and to make it more nurturing for me.

Also, if you are in a female body, yellow lentils are your particular friend! I forgot the details, as I do, I only remember that red and yellow lentils have nutrients that are beneficial for women's health.

While this was cooking, I advanced to the next thing, something that I had been looking forward to making all summer, ever since I came across the marinated/dense bean salad recipes on social media. They always - or quite often - use red cabbage. And so, when there was a red cabbage in my box, I just had to make this:

dense bean salad, with tahini dressing

A dense bean salad, with tahini dressing. See the red cabbage in there? Yay!

All ingredients are:

• 1/2 small red cabbage

• 1 massive carrot

• 3 stalks of celery

• 1 red pepper

• 1 can of mixed beans

And for the tahini dressing:

• tahini - I'd guestimate about 3-4 tablespoons, but cannot say, because I used what was left in the jar

• 4 tablespoons tamari

• 1 tablespoon rice vinegar

• 1 tablespoon sesame oil

• 1 clove of garlic, grated

• cashew-chili-topping

• splash of ginger juice

• juice of half a lime

Okay, so this is very much my version of the dressing: the original uses soy sauce (which I replace with tamari, because tamari is gluten free, and soy sauce isn't); 2-8 tablespoons chili oil, which I don't have; no lime or ginger juice.

I do like my version. And can confirm what all the recipe videos said: This gets better every day, as the veggies marinate in the dressing. Very much recommended!

These two dishes were the bright spot on Friday. I'd been looking forward to making them all morning, while I was slogging through "work". All self-chosen, sure, yet at the same time - a drag on my energy. Which will require further looking into ... but then, there was curry and salad, and I didn't even need to eat either of these to feel - nourished, nurtured, and satisfied.

And I had half expected not to make anything else, because there were the chestnuts and I wanted them roasted, but not actually wanting to roast them - cutting them for roasting is such a tiring thing to do -, so I managed to block myself for a day.

And then this morning decided, screw this, I am not letting myself and my annoying hang-ups get in the way of something I enjoy doing, something that gives me pleasure and fulfils me, that is creative and altogether fun.

So: the twins.

They may not look all that much alike, no. But think of them as fraternal twins: the same ingredients went into both. They simply got mixed up in different ways ...

Explanation? Okay.

The one on the left hand side is oven veggies with white beans - on the right hand side it's pumpkin-sweet potato soup with butter beans.

And this is how I got there:

• 1 small Hokkaido pumpkin

• 1 massive orange sweet potato

• 4 small red potatoes

• 5 tiny onions

• 5 florets of frozen brokkoli

Veggies washed and cut into small cubes, divided more or less equally on a parchment lined oven tray. Drizzle some coconut oil, salt and pepper on top. One the eft hand side went a "veggie kitchen: umami" seasoning blend, on the right hand side the teaspoon-and-a-half that was left in the curry powder jar. The brokkoli florets were the dividing line.

Into the oven at 22°C, for about 25 minutes.

Left hand side got mixed in a pot with white beans.

Right hand side got put into another pot, with about 200ml of oat milk and water, and then blended. Seasoned with more salt, a drizzle of coconut aminos, and a teaspoon of pumpkin spice - because why not?!

And yeah, that's it. My Self-Care in Cooking (Kitchen) Adventures.

I am feeling a lot calmer, more grounded and centred, after the cooking today, and then writing this up.

If you are still here, reading this: Thank you for journeying with me. I wish you all the best in your Kitchen explorations, and may you find what really feeds your Soul.

<3